Pics or it didn't happen, right? ...Right?
A journal entry after debating whether I should document my triathlon training journey on TikTok.
Social media is a highlight reel. It's a voluntary, hand-crafted depiction of people, the lives they live, the resources they have, and the relationships they are in. Sometimes it's true, sometimes it's not. So, what value is there in showing your work – the journey behind the highlight reel – in a space where everyone is trying to make it look easy? What are you trying to show your work for? Who do you want to see it? Why?
Let's return, for a moment, to Pre-Calculus with Mr. Daniels, one of the best teachers we ever had. This is the very setting that first required you to show your work: grade school math class. Why was it important then to show your work? So that your instructor could not only see that you got the correct answer but they could also see your process in getting the correct answer. They needed to validate both the product and the process to gauge your understanding of the lesson.
Okay, but that was a classroom with a clear teacher-student dynamic. There were mutual goals. The teacher needed to teach and the student needed to learn. Showing your work was merely a way to verify that the teacher had indeed taught in a way the student needed to learn. But how does that play into your desire to show your work now? To document your process and progress towards the achievements you want to share. Who does that benefit? What are your goals? What other interests are playing a part in that?
Social media, specifically, is a complicated place to show your work. But why? More often than not, social media is full of people (including you) posting their "answers": a trip, a wedding, a baby, a Benz, a few bands, a new body, a new fit, a new hobby, a new skill, a new project, anything. You, in fact, often post the "answers," the "products" that you're proud of: your community, your travels, your adventures, your wins. Very rarely does anyone show their work, the effort they put into achieving that product. And why would they? Social media can be a cruel and judgmental place with more strangers than friends who have an idea of you but not an understanding of you. It's a dangerous place to show the vulnerability of the process because it's often far messier than a simple math equation. In place of eraser marks on a piece of paper, there are dried-up blood, sweat, and tears with scars seen and unseen that show just how hard you worked to achieve your product. It requires an extreme amount of vulnerability to let people see that.
So we comply and do what everyone else does. We show them what everyone else is showing: the highlight reel of hard-fought wins sans the evidence of just how hard we fought. We only show the battles we won long after the fight is over. We make it look easy, knowing good and well just how difficult it was. It may even feel a bit false, reducing your trials to a cute carousel post with a mulled-over caption with only smiles and joy to show.
But, one would argue, everyone doesn't deserve or even need to see your work. Exposing yourself to strangers by showing your work can do more harm than good, as humans are exceptionally talented at harming each other and weaponizing the very vulnerability we work so hard to cultivate. And I partially agree. Everyone doesn't deserve to have access to your process. There's a level of discernment that's required to know who you can and cannot show your work to. And why show it at all? Your work is not validated by how many people see it or engage with it on the internet. Your answer is no more or no less real based on how many people comment on your post about it. You do not show your work so that others may validate both the process and product, as your old math teacher would. You do not show your work so that others may have more information to add to their idea of you.
You show your work perhaps to keep your community updated on you, to be a part of a larger story, or to solicit the support, encouragement, and inspiration everyone needs at varying levels to keep going.
Let’s not pretend, though, that showing our work is a new desire connected to the growth of social media. Some of the best orchestras in the world host open rehearsals for patrons to witness the inner workings of the group’s music-making process. The NFL’s training camps offer fans an intimate look into how top athletes prepare for their next season. MLB teams have been publicly showing their work at spring training for over a hundred years.
So then I must ask myself, what’s the difference between me and 1918 Babe Ruth playing a spring training game with fans, coaches, and other players around him? No records indicate that he was afraid to show his work, so then why should I be? Sure, that was his profession, and being a professional athlete already came with a certain exposure that he had no issue with. Whereas I, a person with no interest in fame, still have the choice to show my work or not, to be perceived or not, to share my process or not.
I am training for a triathlon, pushing myself to physical, emotional, and mental limits I have never seen before. I don’t want to miss this moment by running with a selfie stick in my hand or setting up a tripod at my local pool, but there has to be another way. There’s something inside of me that wants to document this journey. There is something inside of me that wants to show my work, if for no other reason than to give myself a way to look back on what it took to get me to that finish line.
Perhaps my solution is to avoid social media altogether and instead utilize the spaces I've created for myself to show mywork to my community and reserve my sparsely updated Instagram page for the answers many months after I started to work on them. Is that hiding? Is that robbing some stranger of the inspiration or motivation they needed to do something great? Is that conforming to what everyone else is doing on that app? Is that robbing me of the opportunity to model vulnerability on the internet? Is any of this my problem? Does anyone even care? I'm unsure, honestly.
What I do know is that I want us all to consider what it'd look like if we were more honest with each other. Maybe not with the entire internet, but perhaps just with the people we're in community with. I wonder what it'd look like to model vulnerability for both close friends and friendly acquaintances by showing our work to them. What if we inspired them to show their work to us? What if we could learn from each other? What if it'd ease the struggle for both of us if we shared our process as we're working through it, not just once we get to the end and make it look nice? Is that not a worthy reward for vulnerability? Is that not a risk worth taking?
